Random Thoughts

Weird how I only go to the beach when someone visits.
Sure was a beautiful morning in San Diego.
That's the way it is when you live somewhere. You kind of take it for granted. We have a location just outside our town. You can get an absolutely beautiful view of the area from up there. I proposed to my wife there. Do we EVER go up there? Nope. Not unless we have visitors from out of town.
 
My husband's family have good genes also. His paternal grandfather died when he was 100 while grandma is still with us at 102. On his mom's side everyone makes it near or over 100. The mental capacity minus one or two( granddad had Alzheimer's and Uncle Fred as well at 98 when he passed)are still remarkable.
 
They have their moments still. I am learning a lot about dementia, though.
Dementia and Alzheimer's are bitches. 😥

My mom is from a family of 15 children. Out of that at least 10 have it and many have died from it including my pepere. It is a wretched disease that breaks me when I visit them yearly. My odds of getting Alzheimer's are very, very high. It is something I'm trying to prepare my family for. They don't truly get it but they need to for this could be our lives within 20 years.
 
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Dementia and Alzheimer's are bitches. 😥

My mom is from a family of 15 children. Out of that at least 10 have it and many have died from it including my pepere. It is a wretched disease that breaks me when I visit them yearly. My odds of getting Alzheimer's are very, very high. It is something I'm trying to prepare my family for. They don't truly get it but they need to for this could be our lives within 20 years.
I just hope I am cognisant enough to remember. But my guess is we all do and it appears not to work out that way.

I'm gonna be different!

25 years from now, you'll see!

I love my parents. gave so much for their 5 children.
A doctor, an architect, an engineer and a teacher.
Then there is me, I am still trying to figure out what I want to be.

I would like to think I am wise oldest child.
 
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I just hope I am cognisant enough to remember. But my guess is we all do and it appears not to work out that way.

I'm gonna be different!

25 years from now, you'll see!

I love my parents. gave so much for their 5 children.
A doctor, an architect, an engineer and a teacher.
Then there is me, I am still trying out what I want to be.

I would like to think I am wise oldest child.
I wish you the utmost to be the wise and different one.

Out of three girls, two of mom's three girls will have the great chance of having it vs not. I feel bad wanting to be the one that escapes this if what we were told to be true. But I still want it. It scares me and it makes me angry at the same time.

Going into a long post - a warning.

We have an Acadian festival yearly to celebrate when my people escaped and took the boat to land in Northern Maine. We came from Europe in very early 1700's. Each year an Acadian name is celebrated. My dad's name was celebrated in 1995. My mom's maiden name in 2012. Going up for the latter one I bought the genealogy book for that name, my mom's history. On one of the very first page they have a few paragraphs talking about this disease that was sweeping village after village. Diving further they discovered the disease was Alzheimer's. So my mom and her family had this in their story since they came to America. I haven't done enough research over the pond to learn more about this.


Well, they use to celebrate names, they have gone through all of the names of those who came off the boats. Now it's a celebrate of our Acadian heritage.

So, as simple as it is to say it is what it is, it still gives me a range of emotions. So the rare times mom says my name I treasure it. I feel me calling her weekly and sending cards has a bit to do with that. I also am reminded her telling me years ago she felt she was losing her mind. All I could do was hug her. Knowing that could be my future I'm doing what I can to get the family ready.

I'm rambling now. It's a topic that difficult to talk about but needs to be discussed for the families of those who have dementia or Alzheimer's.


If you ever want to vent to talk about this @AnOldTroll on the side you have my ear. This goes to any here who are in the boat I am, whether that being having a family member with it or you yourself having the potential to having it.

Time to sign off on this post.
 
When I see them, I try and figure out what they are thinking about. Been realizing that is not a good approach.

Just hugging and loving does wonders. Seeing the smiles on their faces does me good, and them too.
I will miss that when it's time. Not looking forward to it. But I am not special in that regard. Love them while you have them.
 
Go live your lives.

That's the whole point.

Go live your lives.

Life on your terms.

Or what else is the point?

It all begins by living life on our terms.

😌😔😌😪🫠

"Just stop your cryin', it's a sign of the times
Welcome to the final show
Hope you're wearin' your best clothes
You can't bribe the door on your way to the sky
You look pretty good down here
But you ain't really good

We never learn, we've been here before
Why are we always stuck and running from
The bullets? The bullets?

We never learn, we've been here before
Why are we always stuck and running from
Your bullets? The bullets?

Just stop your crying, it's a sign of the times
We gotta get away from here
We gotta get away from here
Just stop your crying, it'll be alright

They told me that the end is near
We gotta get away from here

Just stop your crying, have the time of your life
Breaking through the atmosphere
And things are pretty good from here

Remember everything will be alright
We can meet again somewhere
Somewhere far away from here

We never learn, we've been here before
Why are we always stuck and running from
The bullets? The bullets?

We never learn, we've been here before
Why are we always stuck and running from
The bullets? The bullets?

Just stop your crying, it's a sign of the times
We gotta get away from here
We gotta get away from here

Stop your crying, baby, it will be alright
They told me that the end is near
We gotta get away from here

We never learn, we've been here before
Why are we always stuck and running from
The bullets? The bullets?

We never learn, we've been here before
Why are we always stuck and running from
The bullets? Your bullets?

We don't talk enough, we should open up
Before it's all too much

Will we ever learn? We've been here before
It's just what we know

Stop your crying, baby, it's a sign of the times
We gotta get away, we got to get away
We got to get away, we got to get away
We got to get away
We got to, we got to, away
We got to, we got to, away
We got to, we got to, away"


View: https://youtu.be/qN4ooNx77u0
 
Background (in case you didn't know), I have had high blood pressure for years and been on many different medicines. I probably had it long before I was diagnosed and that leads to last fall when I was diagnosed with stage 3a chronic kidney disease. My kidney, as I found out I only have one since birth, was only functioning at 46%. This freaked me out even more and caused even worse high blood pressure for a few months. I'm now on three different blood pressure medicines (beta blocker, water pill, and something else). My heart rate is almost constantly in the 50's due to the beta blocker, sometimes middle to upper 40's. There would be times with my sit down job that I would almost be falling a sleep. This could be a product of the medicine or possible something else (sleep apnea). I went to my family doctor on Monday and she reduced the beta blocker by 25% and it seems to be working on energy level. Blood pressure hasn't been steady but most of the time it is good. I was even 107/67 today at the store with a heart rate in the low 50's and had energy. I'm just trying to nurse this kidney along hopefully forever and never have to worry about dialysis or a transplant. After six months, I feel better about it, my kidney levels have stayed steadyish, my gfr was down to 41 but bumped up to 43 last week.

Of course, the way I look at life with my religion, I don't get scared, I know what my final outcome is going to be. I do need to eat better and exercise more so I can be around for my kids as long as I can. Exercise will get better as weather gets better.

Finally, if you are one of these "I don't go to the doctor" types, check your blood pressure at home. Mine was 140's over 90's for years and I didn't know it, that is probably where my damage to my kidney came from. I will probably end up doing a sleep study for the sleep apnea as my wife says I snore and sometimes loud.
 
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