Hawg73
Mediocre with flashes of brilliance
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In the spirit of his collected works from 2003 I finally got around to collecting IG's great weekly (mostly) game reports for the 2004 season. Enjoy.
Week 1 Knee Jerk Reactions
by It's_Good_It's_Good
*If, God forbid, I'm recuperating from something in a hospital somewhere and I need cheering up to help me with the healing process, please wallpaper my room with pictures of the $34 million Man with that look on his face after Vanderjagt missed that kick.
*And nothing could make it sweeter than knowing that it was his frickin' fault for letting McGinest get to him in the first place. Oh, nectar of life.
*Apparently Big Willie Style didn't get the NFL memo from Tony Dungy and the Competition Committee explaining the "emphasis" on the rule against knocking the creamy filling out of Archie's boys.
*Do you feel like I do; that opening on a Thursday night makes it hard to believe that the game actually counts? It still feels like a big preseason game. I'll need to stare at the league standings for an hour or so Friday morning just so it sinks in.
*The upset of the night was Madden pointing out how Keith Traylor was overpursuing, thus opening gaps in the line for Edgerrin James. This was the first truly insightful comment he's had since the Reagan Administration. Actually, the fat bastard had a hell of a night, with even more good observations as the game wore on. Maybe ABC has replaced him with pre-recorded comments in a database that just play automatically as the situation dictates, like in "Madden 2005."
*The most overrated stat in all of sports is the NFL "start." Corey Dillon was the only HB on their entire roster, but on the first drive they went with 5-wide, therefore he didn't "start." That's like saying Pedro Martinez didn't get a start because he was in the dugout while the Sox batted first.
*Frankly I watched the pre-game hoping against hope the NFL would let us see Janet's other breast. But apparently ABC had her house surrounded.
*BTW, like Mrs. Dungy, Jessica Simpson definitely did not have a collapsed lung.
*That spin move that Dwight Freeney made on Matt Light for the sack was the same move I patented on many of the dance floors of Boston back in the 1980s. Usually I broke it out for Kaja Goo Goo's "Too Shy" or the break on Nenah Cherry's "Buffalo Stance." Get me laid, you ask? It nearly did.
*These sideline reporters need to get this through their cement heads: asking Belichick about the "new" chuck rule is like asking George W. Bush about how he "stole" the election in Florida.
*I'm not sure what it means, but Vince Wilfork played the entire 1st qtr. and well into the 2nd at NT before they sent in Traylor. I thought he played well, although I thought VW had a chance to take that fumble all the way to the house.
*What I learned from the promos for ABCs The Lost is that if you're ever in an airplane crash over water, the only survivors will be boring actors and hot babes.
*I don't know if anyone else caught it, but it was nice to see Dillon signalling "TD" on Grahams catch in the endzone. It was a minor gesture, and it happened behind the play, but I think it's indicative of what he's been saying: he doesn't care about his numbers, he just wants to win. But if he says he should have been running out the clock in the 4th qtr intead of them throwing the ball, he has my total support.
*In the 3rd in particular, Tom Brady converted more 3rd-and-longs than he converted Bledsoephiles in 2001.
*When they show the camera angle from behind and above Brady, I can't help but wonder how in the name of Sweet Merciful Sammy Baugh he sees those passing lanes open.
*But Brady was dead wrong about one thing. The best line in Scarface is "Pelican! Pelican! Fly, pelican!"
*That was one of the all-time great regular season games. I was dizzy, lightheaded and my left shoulder was numb, which means I think I was having a stroke. So I hate to be a wet blanket. but let's all admit that if this is how they're gonna play against the run this year, all of us are wasting our time here.
*And having Arizona next on the schedule is like popping a winning scratch ticket.
__________________
Weis agreed to let Montana call the first play against Washington on Saturday. He called "pass right."
Montana never got to see the play. He died Friday at his home.
When the Irish started on their own 1-yard-line following a fumble recovery, Mazurkiewicz wasn't sure Notre Dame would be able to throw a pass. Weis was concerned about that, too. So was quarterback Brady Quinn.
"He said 'What are we going to do?'" Weis said. "I said 'We have no choice. We're throwing it to the right.'"
Fasano caught the pass and leapt over a defender for a 13-yard gain
Last edited by ItsGood_ItsGood on 09-12-2004 at 09:34 PM
Week 1 Knee Jerk Reactions
by It's_Good_It's_Good
*If, God forbid, I'm recuperating from something in a hospital somewhere and I need cheering up to help me with the healing process, please wallpaper my room with pictures of the $34 million Man with that look on his face after Vanderjagt missed that kick.
*And nothing could make it sweeter than knowing that it was his frickin' fault for letting McGinest get to him in the first place. Oh, nectar of life.
*Apparently Big Willie Style didn't get the NFL memo from Tony Dungy and the Competition Committee explaining the "emphasis" on the rule against knocking the creamy filling out of Archie's boys.
*Do you feel like I do; that opening on a Thursday night makes it hard to believe that the game actually counts? It still feels like a big preseason game. I'll need to stare at the league standings for an hour or so Friday morning just so it sinks in.
*The upset of the night was Madden pointing out how Keith Traylor was overpursuing, thus opening gaps in the line for Edgerrin James. This was the first truly insightful comment he's had since the Reagan Administration. Actually, the fat bastard had a hell of a night, with even more good observations as the game wore on. Maybe ABC has replaced him with pre-recorded comments in a database that just play automatically as the situation dictates, like in "Madden 2005."
*The most overrated stat in all of sports is the NFL "start." Corey Dillon was the only HB on their entire roster, but on the first drive they went with 5-wide, therefore he didn't "start." That's like saying Pedro Martinez didn't get a start because he was in the dugout while the Sox batted first.
*Frankly I watched the pre-game hoping against hope the NFL would let us see Janet's other breast. But apparently ABC had her house surrounded.
*BTW, like Mrs. Dungy, Jessica Simpson definitely did not have a collapsed lung.
*That spin move that Dwight Freeney made on Matt Light for the sack was the same move I patented on many of the dance floors of Boston back in the 1980s. Usually I broke it out for Kaja Goo Goo's "Too Shy" or the break on Nenah Cherry's "Buffalo Stance." Get me laid, you ask? It nearly did.
*These sideline reporters need to get this through their cement heads: asking Belichick about the "new" chuck rule is like asking George W. Bush about how he "stole" the election in Florida.
*I'm not sure what it means, but Vince Wilfork played the entire 1st qtr. and well into the 2nd at NT before they sent in Traylor. I thought he played well, although I thought VW had a chance to take that fumble all the way to the house.
*What I learned from the promos for ABCs The Lost is that if you're ever in an airplane crash over water, the only survivors will be boring actors and hot babes.
*I don't know if anyone else caught it, but it was nice to see Dillon signalling "TD" on Grahams catch in the endzone. It was a minor gesture, and it happened behind the play, but I think it's indicative of what he's been saying: he doesn't care about his numbers, he just wants to win. But if he says he should have been running out the clock in the 4th qtr intead of them throwing the ball, he has my total support.
*In the 3rd in particular, Tom Brady converted more 3rd-and-longs than he converted Bledsoephiles in 2001.
*When they show the camera angle from behind and above Brady, I can't help but wonder how in the name of Sweet Merciful Sammy Baugh he sees those passing lanes open.
*But Brady was dead wrong about one thing. The best line in Scarface is "Pelican! Pelican! Fly, pelican!"
*That was one of the all-time great regular season games. I was dizzy, lightheaded and my left shoulder was numb, which means I think I was having a stroke. So I hate to be a wet blanket. but let's all admit that if this is how they're gonna play against the run this year, all of us are wasting our time here.
*And having Arizona next on the schedule is like popping a winning scratch ticket.
__________________
Weis agreed to let Montana call the first play against Washington on Saturday. He called "pass right."
Montana never got to see the play. He died Friday at his home.
When the Irish started on their own 1-yard-line following a fumble recovery, Mazurkiewicz wasn't sure Notre Dame would be able to throw a pass. Weis was concerned about that, too. So was quarterback Brady Quinn.
"He said 'What are we going to do?'" Weis said. "I said 'We have no choice. We're throwing it to the right.'"
Fasano caught the pass and leapt over a defender for a 13-yard gain
Last edited by ItsGood_ItsGood on 09-12-2004 at 09:34 PM