Jessica Alba sexually assaulted by Dolphins

[Hawg73]

No, not THOSE Dolphins.

Sexy star JESSICA ALBA is always careful when she's scuba diving, because she doesn't like attracting amorous dolphins.
The actress discovered horny cetacean mammals got aroused by her presence when she was a youngster, shooting dolphin drama FLIPPER.

She recalls, "I don't know if anybody knows this but dolphins get excited, even when you are a human being - and they have long, long... (penises).

"I didn't know this until I was being poked by a few of them, which was very rude. I think I learned my lesson. I sort of request female dolphins after that because those are horny little bastards." Alba reveals the dolphin dilemma became a constant joke at the actress' expense.

She tells MTV News, "Needless to say my closest friends and family did dolphin squeaking noises for the next five years any time they referred to me or called me or talked to me, which was pretty annoying."

 

[Wandering Athol]

Dolphins like tuna....what else is new?

(Parcells looks like he just had a liaison with a horny dolphin in this snapshot, doesn't he?)

 

[RoadGrader]

Dolphins like tuna....what else is new?

 

[Undertaker #59*]

 

[harrisonhits]

Ha pretty soon we'll have new video of Parcells bitch smacking TO on the sidelines

 

[Darth Despot]

All I can add is God Damned Lucky Dolphins

 

[B A Rabbit]

She recalls, "I don't know if anybody knows this but dolphins get excited, even when you are a human being - and they have long, long... (penises).

I think everybody know what a HUGE Fantastic Four fan I am, And that Jessica Alba played one of the lead characters.
Now everytime she opens her mouth a little part of me just dies.

Same thing with Princess Liea. I can't look at her in any sexual way cuz I feel it will pervert my childhood memories.

 

[JD10367]

Re: Re: Jessica Alba sexually assaulted by Dolphins

I think everybody know what a HUGE Fantastic Four fan I am, And that Jessica Alba played one of the lead characters.
Now everytime she opens her mouth a little part of me just dies.

Same thing with Princess Liea. I can't look at her in any sexual way cuz I feel it will pervert my childhood memories.

Okay, so I'm missing the point here... are you saying you DON'T look at Jessica Alba in a sexual way? If that's the case, I advise some lens cleaner for your glasses, LOL...

The best part of "Fantastic Four" was when she became visible in the crowd of people while wearing her bra and panties. THAT'S the scene I want as an avatar; I'd watch that even more than SOKB's dancing hottie.

 

[B A Rabbit]

Re: Re: Re: Jessica Alba sexually assaulted by Dolphins

Okay, so I'm missing the point here... are you saying you DON'T look at Jessica Alba in a sexual way? If that's the case, I advise some lens cleaner for your glasses, LOL...

The best part of "Fantastic Four" was when she became visible in the crowd of people while wearing her bra and panties. THAT'S the scene I want as an avatar; I'd watch that even more than SOKB's dancing hottie.

Obvisousl she is very sexual. Thats not what I am saying. Bt becouse she took the role of a charahter that has been near and dear to my heart since I was about 9, Whenever I see her, I don't see Jessica Alba. I see Sue Storm the invisible woman. And becouse I am SO familiar with what that character is like, I know she would never talk about the penis of a dolphin for instance.

I feel the same wy about Carrie Fischer. I can't lok at her and not think about who I used to play withStarwars toys

Now Natile Portman is different case. Her I'd let slob on my knob till the cows come home. Not becouse she is anything special, But becose the satrwars character she played didn't come around till I was in my early thirties. So the connection to an innocent childhod memory is just not there.

 

[cadmonkey]

Sometimes I wish I had a blowhole!

 

[JD10367]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Jessica Alba sexually assaulted by Dolphins

Obvisousl she is very sexual. Thats not what I am saying. Bt becouse she took the role of a charahter that has been near and dear to my heart since I was about 9, Whenever I see her, I don't see Jessica Alba. I see Sue Storm the invisible woman. And becouse I am SO familiar with what that character is like, I know she would never talk about the penis of a dolphin for instance.

I wasn't a big "Fantastic Four" fan as a kid, but the comic books I remember (early to mid 70's) were pretty crudely drawn, so I don't even think of her as being as hot as that more recent incarnation. She was pretty much a long, skinny woman with limp blond hair, LOL.