Anybody Know Any Good Jokes?

[TipRoast]

Q: What's the difference between the ignorant and the irreverent?

A: Damned if I know.

 

[BostonTim]

Q: What's the difference between the ignorant and the irreverent?

A: Damned if I know.

So there isn't any!

 

[spacecrime]

Q: What's the difference between the ignorant and the irreverent?

A: Damned if I know.

Someone said i was apathetic and I told him, "So what, who cares?"

 

[TipRoast]

 

[ParanoidPatriot]

It's April and we are getting a blizzard, ha ha ha ha.

 

[patfan64]

Just 10 kinds of people in the world, them who speak binary and them that don't.

Actually, there are 10 kinds of people in this world, those who understand binary, those who don't and those who were expecting a base 3 joke.

 

[BostonTim]

What did the redneck say to the clerk when he went to rent a truck???

How U-Haul doin???

 

[RoadGrader]

 

[BostonTim]

Blizzard,, eclipse, earthquakes, what's next, a plague of Locusts???

 

[PumpDee]

"Look!! Up in the sky!!! It's a bird!!! It's a,.....OH MY GOD!!! IT BURNS!!!!! IT BUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRNNNSSS!!!!!"

 

[Patriots44]

Blizzard,, eclipse, earthquakes, what's next, a plague of Locusts???

Will cicadas do?

 

[BostonTim]

Will cicadas do?

I actually know that cicadas aren't locusts, but I'm aiming for biblical.

Cheers,

 

[Big/Sky/Fly]

Will cicadas do?

You’ll love the taste of them…

 

[BostonTim]

You’ll love the taste of them…

And when eat you them they finally shut tf up.

 

[BostonTim]

Old standby:

So this optometrist, falls into the lens grinding machine and makes a spectacle of himself.

 

[O.Z.O.]

So, the Biden campaign is looking to attract another small special interest group. They're called Nikki Haley supporters...

 

[PumpDee]

A man asked his girlfriend to smuggle some coke onto a flight from Miami to Boston in her privates. She agreed but got very upset when they arrived at their cruising altitude. After the flight attendant got done pushing the cart by them, he leaned over to her and said, "Honey, I had no idea I could buy a can for $2.00."

 

[Gumpboy45]

A man asked his girlfriend to smuggle some coke onto a flight from Miami to Boston in her privates. She agreed but got very upset when they arrived at their cruising altitude. After the flight attendant got done pushing the cart by them, he leaned over to her and said, "Honey, I had no idea I could buy a can for $2.00."

$2 MY ASS!! More like $8, Bitch shove that shit up there

 

[Big/Sky/Fly]

A man asked his girlfriend to smuggle some coke onto a flight from Miami to Boston in her privates. She agreed but got very upset when they arrived at their cruising altitude. After the flight attendant got done pushing the cart by them, he leaned over to her and said, "Honey, I had no idea I could buy a can for $2.00."

Why did she get very upset?

 

[imapig]

View: https://youtu.be/qQseDjVp10I?si=RcV5iCLLW0WK5lBb